On Fire

Right now I’m in the midst of a lot of projects. I am being considered for a scholarship to two separate conferences, I am going to a poetry conference next weekend, I have just started my independent study in creative nonfiction, I am still looking for schools for my MFA, and I am now preparing to teach a creative writing class to at risk youth in my community. Why is it that the creative life happens this way for me? I go through periods of drought and doubt where I can’t seem to get any work going and I feel terrible about my life. Other times, I can barely breathe. So many good things are happening but I wish it could be paced out a little. I’m in school full time and it becomes a juggling act.

I shouldn’t complain when good things happen. I don’t mind being busy or obsessively working on a project. I do mind the periods where nothing is happening and I have trouble motivating myself.

My plan this weekend is to finish a scholarship packet, get ahead on class reading, write about five pages, and start planning the exercises for the class. I’ve found some great teaching resources put out by WritersCorps along with youth writing they’ve published. I’m a little nervous because I haven’t taught before. At the same time, I’m excited. Writing is my passion and I can’t wait to share it. We live in an ageist society where the voices of our youth are ignored. I’d like to give them some tools to aid in their writing but also to encourage them to keep writing.

I plan on taking a social justice/awareness slant. I want to share audio, art, news, and written works that will inspire them. I don’t think video is an option, otherwise I’d show some spoken word videos. Anyone know of artists who record spoken word? Any ideas for media I can share with them would be awesome.

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2 Responses to On Fire

  1. Marahm says:

    Keep the faith, Brandi. You are young, and I promise your life will even out, and you’ll be able to establish more control in terms of productivity and motivation. I admire you for going after your writing passion.

    I did not go after mine, when I was your age, and I’ve regretted it often.

    • Thank you for your kind words and support. Sometimes it seems like a steady point is so far off. I’ll keep plugging away at it. Doubt is just so hard to overcome, writing is really an industry where you open yourself up to criticism and it isn’t always nice. My CNF teacher told me that to be a writer, you have to grow a thick skin. I think she was right.

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